Until the age of 14, I didn’t come home from the streets. Until my 20s, I played excessive video games, and until my mid-20s, I worked excessively. I used to consume very little water and indulged in pastries and packaged foods as snacks.
If we take a look at these extremes throughout the process, we can understand that addiction has transformed but continued until now. It had just changed its form outwardly and continued to fulfill the same role (Emotional Escape).
All of this stemmed from my attempt to suppress and fill the void inside me externally.
My family had tried to soothe me by putting something in my mouth for most of my needs since infancy. It was a learning that continued into adulthood. Therefore, instead of recognizing my emotions, I learned to suppress and dismiss them with food.
All of these were the results of an inability to stop and recognize emotions.
It was a consequence of what I had learned so far.
Therefore, by making the choices we are about to make now, we can uproot this addiction instead of just trimming its branches. When we realize this, the power of transformation falls into our hands. Thus, we can leave these addictions at their roots.
Looking back and learning lessons from what we’ve experienced in life can be beneficial for gaining insights and strength.
So before you continue, take a minute or two and look at what you’ve been trying to fill that void inside you with on the outside?
The Chasm of Deficiency
Everything we do excessively is a sign of escapism. It creates an illusion that we are escaping from the other extreme that we perceive as bad. In reality, if we take one step, we will fall into the other extreme, but we are unaware of it.
Think about it: how a person laughs, laughs, starts laughing uncontrollably, and tears come to their eyes. Just a step away, the other end of that laughter is crying.
That’s why it’s important to realize that when we go to extremes, the other end is near.
It’s a step to protect us from both judgment and creating such an addiction.
Another example is constantly doing things outside, being unable to stop and progress, which signifies a great inner deficiency.
Not being able to turn your gaze inward means seeking eyes outside that you want to see yourself in.
Running after external approval is no different from gossiping about the outside.
Both mean redirecting your energy outward rather than inward. The only one creating this deficiency inside is you.
The outside is just a tool. It’s a stage that shows ourselves in all nakedness.
Applying what you’ve learned so far, listening to people with the same views, and following old routines were easy things.
If you think they nourished you, we can say yes to a certain extent. For example, they advise taking a break even after using a remedy, medicine, or supplement for a month. Because the body gets used to it, and its effect diminishes.
People also get used to addictions. As people get used to them, they start defining themselves through them. They can become incapable of seeing them as an addiction.
Listening to different voices, listening to and watching yourself increases awareness at this point. Realizing and embracing this awareness you gained and implementing new actions in your life initiates transformation.
Beyond Doing
We have the power to quit this addiction at any moment. Strengthening our willpower with small steps, revealing the existing power of will is possible.
As you start revealing this existing power of will, your self-confidence will increase.
As self-confidence begins to form, it will nourish this willpower. A mutually nourishing process will take place.
You are just afraid of being a different version of yourself. You are trying to avoid effort and choose the easy way out.
You are also afraid that your environment will change because you will change. Hence, you are hesitant to take action.
After choosing the easy path, you will most likely face some difficulties.
Finding the middle ground between this easy and difficult with your own willpower will be beneficial for you. You have already made your choices.
Understanding why you made those choices, learning lessons from them, and beautifying your life path is why you are here. Breaking free from addiction and achieving inner contentment starts here.
Overcoming these long-standing addictions may be challenging at first. Taking steps gradually and seeking psychological support according to the situation is recommended.
Your own existence comes to the forefront through experience. No one has walked in your shoes. No one can tell you exactly what to do. They can only offer advice.
Being content with existence beyond doing means not feeling the need to do something.
One Step Further
What does it provide us and which steps do we take?
Practicing various meditation techniques, spending time in areas where we are accepted without status will be supportive steps on this path.
Also, creating environments that support these practices will make your journey easier.